Therapy is going pretty good these days, even if it is exhausting. I have spent a lot of time thinking about things,over the past few weeks and stirred up a lot of things that I didn’t want to talk about, things I have experienced that I thought was normal – which wasn’t and I have started to remember things that are important to say.
I have shared a lot of intimate things, shameful things, things I am proud of.
And I am now very proud of myself, and that is allowed. To be proud of one self is not narcissistic or a bad thing, doesn’t mean you are full of yourself. If you can be proud of others, why can you not be proud of yourself as well,
We have talked about pride in therapy, while I don’t feel I have much to be proud of in my life right now, I do have this. I am stronger and braver then I thought. It gives me a good feeling in my stomach writing that, which I believe to be pride.
I have started a new medication as the old one didn’t really work anymore + I had a very small dosage. The medicine is Venalafaxin Bluefish, I started with one pill for 5 days, and today is the 6th day which means I am upping my dosage to 2 pills a day. And that is were I will stay.
So far I haven’t felt much noticable changes, it’s supposedly going to take around 2 weeks before I will notice anything. I have had a bit more initiative which is nice. If that is the medicine or just a placebo effect, time can only tell. I am however having some hot flashes tonight, and some weird tinglings in my limbs – which may only be anxiety because I am always a bit scared of using medicine.
I will give you an update if I feel any noticeable changes when it comes to the medicine.
I have been continuing playing some Minecraft with my oh so patient boyfriend. He is doing some mechanical computer stuff things, with tons of pipes and what not,
while I am in love with Botanica. We have found The End and killed the beautiful dragon in the ever so dark and Ender filled dimension and it was a lot of fun. It wasn’t exactly hard, but it was fun to meet an actual boss!
Today I got some time to venture into WoW again, I wish I could play some more but at the moment I am prioritizing some more time with BF rather then WoW. But soon enough I will be back to play a lot more again. Right now I barely have time for an hour a day.
But today I got together with a guildie – Grim and we had a lot of fun in the BG’s. I was a lil healer monk and he was a human warrior meat shield. We won some and we lost some, people got healed, and people died. And I really enjoyed it. We also got a visit from two other guildies for a few games, Adolyte and our beloved Frez ❤