I know I am neglecting the blog a bit. I haven’t had much to say or share I guess. Sometimes we have the urge to write, other times we don’t.
Reasons might be because I am not super involved into any particular game at the moment.
And I am not the kind of “nerd” that read about tons of games and get super excited and dig into all the info there is.
So I end up with not writing I guess.
Recently picked up Heavensward – ffxiv.
Just playing an hour here an hour there on Cactuar where the blogger gang is.
I feel it’s hard to really dig into the game because I don’t see me going into any end game conent, and that is usually what I look forward to. But as I often have lags I don’t feel I can join in with things like that anyways. I would just be more of an annoyance to the team then help. So yeah, I just dabble alone mostly, leveling my lowbie Miqote.
I did try the new race, Au Ra, I adored her, but in the end the horns just got to me. They started to annoy me so I reverted back to a kittycat as I had some potions left over since I made the character.
My goal is to get to one of the new classes, the new healer – Astrologian. I have no idea how they work, but I love healing so I have to try it.
I also want to try and get the new tank – Dark Knight, they wield big ass swords, so yeah, I have to try that.
The Machinist, which is the third new class doesn’t really interest me. It uses some sort of guns and I don’t really like using guns when there are other options.
I am still doing my youtube thing.
It’s going okay I guess. I have my doubts from time to time if it’s something I should continue with or not. But hopefully that doubt will back off soon. I have had a period where I have felt very good about the things I do. But sometimes I just feel it’s a waste of my time and others.
I guess I just find that I am not an entertaining person, and have doubts that people will watch.
Got to remember why I started with it in the first place, but it’s easy to forget.
I just have such a hard time getting involved in things, and really dig into it. Make it become a part of me and my daily life. I don’t know where to get my inspiration from, how to get creative. They say creativity is something you can teach yourself over time, I am just struggling with it right now.
(shameless promoting my channel on blog)
Also think it has something to do with my depression. As I mentioned I have had a good period now over the past few months, but this last week has been a hard one. I have struggled to just get out of bed and try to do anything. Often I have gone to bed around 6 oclock and just slept a few hours, because I didn’t want to be awake.
I think I might have to have a hard think about my channel, maybe switch it up a bit with more personal things rather then gaming. Seems people enjoy my random things more then my gaming things, and I do enjoy doing vlogs as well, so why not.
As I have mentioned before, I have been thinking about restarting my channel, but I have worked hard to get the little bunch of viewers I have now, so I am still undecided about that.
One tiresome thing about Youtube is that it feels like a horrible game, people run around, subscribing to get a sub back. Watching a minute of the video just to have a comment to say, some don’t even watch and write down generic comments like: Great Video, check out my channel. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.
For one, it makes me feel that what I am doing is totally useless and that my content sucks, it fucks up my retention on my videos because people watch 2 seconds of my video and moves on, which means my ranking gets even worse then it was.
I hate that game, and I don’t want to be apart of it. I watch the whole video when I go around commenting, I say what I liked in the video, give a like and move on. If I don’t like it, I move on to some other channel I like instead. Generic comments and sub for sub is just a fucking annoyance.
Yes I sub for people I know who have subbed for me, because I KNOW THEM, and want to support and watch them. THAT is totally different.
Sorry, I just had to get that out, been annoying me for quite some time. Because you can’t avoid it, it’s everywhere.
What else? SHRIMPROONIES!
We got shrimps! TINYTINY shrimps. We bought a tiny tank, and 6 shrimps. And we suddenly had 7 shrimps, so there was a baby too!
Sadly one shrimp died today, hopefully it was an old shrimp and no disease. Exciting I know. Shrimps 😛 Well I think they are a funny bunch that just crawl and swim around. Hopefully there will be many baby’s!